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Gay Washington DC: MW / Metro Weekly magazine Thursday, Nov 17, 2005 edition       Join our Mailing List       Where to get a copy       E-mail this to a Friend     
gay, news, films, movies, entertainment, lesbian, clubs, nightlife, bars, D.C.
· Strike Up the Band
After 25 Years, Time Marches On for the D.C. Different Drummers
· Courting the Community
The D.C. mayoral election may be a year away, but for Adrian Fenty it's never too early to start the campaign
· The Mame Event
Carl Rizzi talks about 32 years as president of The Academy in Washington, coming out gay, and dressing in high drag as Mame Dennis

New This Week
  CLASSIFIEDS

Classifieds - Housing, Services, Jobs

Personals - Dating & fun.

  FEATURES

SMYAL Like You Mean It - The organization advocating for LGBTIQ youth turns another corner with Bruce Weiss at the helm

Thanks for the Memories - A holiday season sampler of the dishes that make Thanksgiving memorable

  GAUGE

Open House - Commentary: In Exile

Deciphering System - CDC points to MSM as bearers of the STD torch, but local experience may tell a different story

Horoscope - November 17-23, 2005

  HOME

Environs - Charlie's Columbia Heights condo

  ARTS

FILM:
Cashing In - Despite great performances, 'Walk the Line' is dramatically static, while 'Kiss Kiss' is too gimmicky for its own good

STAGE:
Queen Bee - It's queen takes all 'As Bees in Honey Drown,' while 'Yemaya's Belly' contains lush poetry and enormous imagination

MUSIC:
High Note - Madonna moves beyond more recent stumbles, making sure you'll fall for her (or at least her music) all over again

THIS WEEK:
Out on the Town

  COMMUNITY

Community Calendar

Weather Forecast

News Headlines

  NIGHTLIFE

DANCE MUSIC:
Soundwaves - Eurythmics, Platinum Weird, Infusion

EVENTS:
Tonight's Drink Specials

  SCENE

Club Chaos

Us Helping Us

Ultimate Amateur Contest

SMYAL's 8th Annual Fall Brunch

  Feature Story

Sean Hemeon

Coverboy 2nd Runner Up


 

Sean Hemeon

His is a cautionary tale, stuffed with all the necessary ingredients: youth, beauty, alcohol, drugs, sex, crime, desperation and, of course, redemption. It's difficult to imagine how Sean Hemeon, just 23, packed so much life into a few chemically-fueled years. But it's a true story, says the recovering crystal meth addict, one he hopes will prevent other people from making the same mistakes.

Tall, slender and handsome, Sean was a high school football and lacrosse star. Popular and outwardly confident, he went to all the right parties and dated all the right girls. But beneath the veneer of normality, he harbored a secret that he shared only with his best friend, who was his secret boyfriend. For four years, the two hid their relationship from the world. Even when his friend moved into the Hemeon household during their junior year, nobody knew about their love.

All of that came crashing down during Sean's freshman year of college. Sean's boyfriend met another guy, and summarily dismissed his high school lover.

"I just crashed," Sean says. The twin hardships of being dumped and coming out led to him attempting suicide.

"I didn't know who I was," he says. "I had this image of who everyone wanted me to be, this straight, football-lacrosse, typical senior. And that wasn't me. The only real me was with this boyfriend. And when he left me I didn't know what to do."

Yet his suicide attempt opened doors to the acceptance he always craved. Rather than reject him, his straight friends embraced him, saying, "We love you, man. Who cares if you're gay?"

Restored and very much alive Sean tried an acting stint in New York City during the fall of 2001, before heading back to Washington. It was then that he got pulled into the drugs and all-night parties subculture. Alcohol binges led to other drugs: GHB, ecstasy and crystal meth.


Through dating a dealer, selling drugs, totaling his car, getting caught by cops with a stash of drugs, and smuggling drugs through airports, Sean still hadn't hit bottom. That came when, unemployed and using crystal daily, he blew a few grand on a birthday party and crashed afterwards, having a nervous breakdown. A call for help to his parents led to his enrollment in a 28-day rehab program. It saved his life.

"Treatment was an awakening," he says. "A lot of my drinking and drugging was me running from myself, running from the fact of being gay."

Sober for more than two months, Sean goes to 12-step meetings every day now, slowly nurturing his newfound sobriety with new friends also in recovery. He's dealing with all the baggage he carries from being a closeted child in a Mormon household -- dealing with the demons he tried to keep at bay with crystal.

"Crystal is a serious epidemic going on in this city right now," he says. Looking back on his reckless sexual behavior -- multiple encounters every day, many unprotected -- Sean considers himself amazingly lucky not to be infected with HIV. But he worries about the risk-taking that he and others have taken on the drug. "When you're on crystal, you feel invincible," he says. "You don't care for your life, so you make bad choices."

Today, back in the land of the living, he cherishes his nearly 70 days of sobriety, days that have allowed him to begin growing and learning again. Even nightlife has lessons for him now: "I can dance without being fucked up."

He's working again for a small nonprofit, where he does administrative work, and is at home living with his parents in Virginia. When he's ready, he hopes to move into a recovery halfway house operated by the Whitman-Walker Clinic. And he's ready to seriously pursue his acting career again, hoping to enroll in the Studio Theatre Acting Conservatory in the future.

Sean's also healing his personal relationships. He's growing closer to his family. He went paint-balling with his little brother recently, and his dad came to a family night with his recovery group.

"I spent a lot of time running away from my family," he says. "I've had 10 years to accept my coming out; they've had three. It doesn't matter if my dad doesn't understand me, it just matters that he loves me."

Slowly, day by day, Sean's putting it all together again, learning how to eat right and take care of his body again. Now each day is spent in search of integrity rather than the illusory high that comes with crystal.

"I've been lying to myself for my whole life," he says, "but I've learned the more honest you are with yourself, the happier you'll be."

Second Runner Up Prize Package
$150 Cash
Apex
-- Five Admission Passes
ATLAS/Lizard Lounge -- Lizard Lounge $50 Bar Hospitality Voucher and a selection of Mixed CDs by Lizard Lounge Resident DJ Kostas
Cherry -- Two Tickets to Main Event
Cobalt -- $50 Bar Tab plus 5 VIP Passes

Empire Video -- Ten Free Rentals
Freddie's Beach Bar
-- Freddie's T-shirt
Halo -- $25 Bar Tab
JR.'s -- $25 Bar Tab
Leather Rack -- $25 Gift Certificate
Mid-Atlantic Leather Weekend 2005 -- Two tickets to Reaction Dance (Sunday, Jan. 16, 2005)
Ziegfeld's/Secrets -- $25 Bar Tab
Please note: Some restrictions may apply to certain prizes.
 

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